Sometimes somethings happen that make you think about things. Something that was mentioned yesterday and an innocent email made me think of remarks that were made to me a few months ago. If I am honest with myself I can understand why they were said however I am still certain they were the result of taking things out of context, and a few comments made to me made me even more convinced I made the right decision.

Its all about self perception really.

Last year when I started here I would wear trousers and jumpers every day. It was comfortable, it was inconspicuos and above all, after an innocent remark from someone I couldn't be accused of dressing for someone.

Many people know I have self esteem issues and can be so self consious and shy, however I realised at some point earlier this year that I can change me, I can be who I want to be. And so instead of being comfortable and inconspicuous I decided I wanted to wear skirts and boots and tights (Fishnets maybe) and so I did. Don'y get me wrong, my skirts are all about knee length or below, the fishnets are tiny and I look smart. From the reaction of some people when I mentioned I wanted to do this was as if I had said I was going to wear mini skirts and crop tops, or thats the way I perceived it anyway.

But the thing is, I know I needed to change. I needed to change the way I see myself and it worked. I am not saying that this alone changed me but was a part of it.

The thing that most recently struck me was a comment by a work mate. He was travelling when I made the change and a few weeks ago mentioned something, saying I was "frumpy" before he left. I used the excuse as "It was winter and cold" but the truth is, I was. But feel different now.

Anyway, enough self indulgence and stuff!!

I am sitting in work with no senior management team around me! They have all disappeared for the morning so I am not feeling like someone is looking over my shoulder all the time :)

In other news, the new dress I was forced to buy yesterday (Sminchin and Faffajane are such a bad influence.... ;):)) ) looks very nice and I have decided to wear it friday :)

After a nightmare journey into work this morning, where my train was cancelled, I had to get on the next one so had to get the Victoria line, which I hate, and had to watch about 4 tubes go past before I was literally shoved onto the train, this morning seems quite relaxing :) Hopefully the rest of the week will pass quickly and maybe I will find out why one of our ceiling tiles here is missing, which I just noticed!!!