Starry Night...

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Starry Night...

by louisa-outram ^Pro @ 08.07.2007 – 10:59:44

I have just dyed my hair Starry Night I hope this lasts a little loinger than the last few

When I started this blog it was designed to be nothing more than a place to put my thoughts doen., At the time I had far too many thoughts running through my head and it had stopped me sleeping on occasion.

Since I started, well over a year ago (even though that blog was deleted D'oh!!!) It has become much more than that and Found some incredible people .

Lately though, some of the things I write have started getting me into a little trouble with friends. I haven't written bad things, just thoughts and feelings, but some people didn't like them I guess.

After some happenings of a few nights ago I have decided to cut back with what I write here. I am not leaving, nor am I going to say I will take a break, as I always end up with lots to say if I do

But for the moment, I will think more about my posts before they are written.
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11 Comments to Starry Night...

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- ajnspencer ^Pro
- http://www.devonwallart.co.uk
- 08.07.2007 @ 13:13:19
Hehe, does that mean there's little silver sparkles in it?
- - louisa-outram ^Pro
  - 08.07.2007 @ 13:15:20
  Umm no its blue black I could always get some silver glitter spray though
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- Heather (Visitor)
- 09.07.2007 @ 09:40:32
Hi.Just to say that I think the Girls understand you use the blog to blow off steam, but in future I think they'd appreciate it if you tell them when there's a problem by getting in touch with them.They are your friends so they want to know when you're not happy. Anywho, that's all. Hope you get on well.Take care and everything!Heather.x
- - louisa-outram ^Pro
  - 09.07.2007 @ 09:59:09
  I don't have any problems. I never did. It seemed to me that it was //other// people who had problems with **me**.
  
  And I have never been someone who's been able to tell people I am unhappy. I just can't see the point of me sending texts or emails just to say I am sad, when I know that I am better off alone. I can't handle being questioned when I feel like that and I hate crying at people.
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- Heather (Visitor)
- 09.07.2007 @ 15:33:18
Ok...but just remember that it's better to be in contact with people. One of the reasons I stopped trying really was because you'd often not come to things or contact us. I understand now that you were maybe going thru some bad stuff..but don't suffer alone.Tell someone/the girls/anyone.Take care.x
- - louisa-outram ^Pro
  - 09.07.2007 @ 16:00:48
  To be honest with you there were several times I felt like I wasn't welcome. Many of the stuff you organised I was left off of your original email list and not realised things were happening (I am talking about last year, around June time I think, I know it wasn't a recent thing). I very much doubt is was deliberate, but it felt really awkward to find out half way through. I //always// tried to say when I couldn't come, if I knew about it though. I would never deliberately just ignore everyone.
  
  I know that keeping in contact is important. An email just to say hello goes a long way, and its something we are all guilty of not sending.
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- Heather (Visitor)
- 09.07.2007 @ 17:24:18
I know I've left you off things in the last year or so but it's coz I don't feel I know you anymore. Certainly nothing malicious (not really deserving of bitch comment-gentle teasing there, I understand you were blowing off steam)..just one of those things where you lose touch. We invited you to lots of things pre June last year but you often didn't come. I remember a time when everyone was coming to mine, and we didn't find out you weren't coming until one of the girls phoned you to see where you were. Don't ever think you're not welcome/let that worry stop you from coming out. As I've said before...I don't have anything against you at all, you're a lovely person, I just don't think we had a strong enough relationship to start with and since then we've grown apart. It's natural I suppose!Do please keep in contact with the girls tho and i'm sure I'll see you again soon!Take care.Hev
- - louisa-outram ^Pro
  - 09.07.2007 @ 17:34:10
  That time, I text you through out the week trying to find where I needed to go. I know you never sent it to anyone till about 4pm that Saturday but I am so nervous about getting on the train without knowing where I am going that I just couldn't do it. And we went to Little Venice since then. Anything else I didn't come to, like birthday things was because I //couldn't//. Things were organised on weekends where I had stuff to do.
  
  And you **all** never ever came to anything I tried to organise. Anything for //my// birthday, or just to see me, never materialised because you all ended up booking other things for those weekends.
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- Heather (Visitor)
- 09.07.2007 @ 17:41:25
Well maybe that's an area for you and the girls to work on. Friendships takes lots of effort. Take care of yourself.Heather
- - louisa-outram ^Pro
  - 09.07.2007 @ 17:47:00
  Actually friendship doesn't.
  
  and it appears you have got something against me or you'd still be willing to try. Had it been anybody else you wouldn't have given up so easily.
  
  I have been able to maintain friendships with people from school despite the lack of contact. It doesn't mean I know them as well as I used to but i still consider them a friend. I would have done the same with you had you been willing to try but its obvious your not.
  
  Take care Heather.
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- Heather (Visitor)
- 09.07.2007 @ 18:24:23
Oh dear...I'm sorry you feel that way and continue to take this all so personally. I just don't think we've been in touch enough to know each other anymore. You must have had the same sort of thing with other people (like in Uni) whereby through natural lack of contact you drift?
Anyway, I wish you all the best and reiterate that i don't have anything against you at all.As an example of how we don't know each other anymore -I don't hold grudges and if I had something against you, I'm a strong enough person to just come out with it and get it sorted. I think you're wrong about friendships not requiring lots of effort...to keep close friendships alive with many people we all often have to work hard at it particulalrly when there's distance involved.It's probably as you said earlier that it's something we're both guilty of but let's just mark it down to one of those things, and not continue this daft situation or put the girls in the middle of it. Take care of you and maybe we'll see each other with the girls one day over a glass of wine and some crisps and dip (If Son is there!0Take care.Heather
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